Chicago Forest Fund (CFF) to see Ellen Fund and a Fringe Fest!

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Thank you Knockback Nats, Karen Wesdorp, Michael Burch,Nicholas Sweeney, mom, my Aunt, and numerous other people from downtown Cincinnati for your contributions to my Chicago Forest Fund (CFF) to see Ellen Fund!  I appreciate all the help I’ve received and will receive on my road to Ellen!  I’d also like to thank the Cincinnati Fringe Fest and The Know Theater for giving me a taste of what’s to come!!! 
 
To the one mean women of my past few days, who pretentiously accused me of not being a true supporter of the art’s, and simply an attention whore, I hope you find much success and happiness in your life!  The entire time you were fumbling to make a point, at times insulting my T-Rex chain, I just wanted to let you know that I was thinking about important stuff!  Important stuff like the American education system, which obviously needs to be reformed because you’re a by-product of it!  Important things like evolutionary mechanics.  Honestly people like you make me question just how important intelligence really is to the procreation of our species!  Important things like why you’d hide your lovely figure behind such an awfully dreadful dress/curtain!  T-Rex took offense to what you said, but then some chick started making out with him and he forgot all about it, BITCH!  Ya that’s right, I just called this evil women a bitch for being mean to T-Rex!  I meant it in a bad way, not in the you’re cool way!  Thus out of our lovely conversation I present to you… 
 
“Why Doth a Playwright Write?”
 
Why doth a playwright write?  Curiosity lived out the pen’s delight?  Is it right to write and accept what is written to be something worthy of one smitten?  What is proper in the articulation of life distraction as a mechanical contraption transcribes a soul’s secrets, the life transposed confides and defines the essence of lives beautiful bribes?  Why doth a playwright write?  Bringing fourth intangible experiences and neuron interpretation of our senses, generating symbolic relics, which mean nothing without an other to bother a brother, a mother, or some other form of genetic combination capable of comprehending all that transcends from one so condescending?  Who defines art, where doth thy pin point place that dart?  Of that word, that nasty art word, I truly believe to define it is absurd.  For when you constrain expression, that is simply a recipe for deception.  For when you define expression, you bring fourth an undeserving oppression.  You nip thy loins of transgression, forcing countless untested and unseen unknowns into regression.  For you to say that art is defined by rules, is like me deciding rocks aren’t tools!  You’re a bitch and T-Rex doesn’t like you!
 
I’m glad I got that out my system!  With this I say to all the artist of the world, and everyone is both an artist and a work of art given the “right” perception, don’t let someone rain on your parade!  If what you do makes you happy, if it allows you to communicate concepts, if it helps define who you are, then keep doing it!  I also recommend you don’t talk shit about my T-Rex!  If he eats you, who am I to stop him?

UPDATE!

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All journeys have highs and lows!  The difference between people who keep trekking to the top and those who completely derail is that those who succeed don’t get discouraged when they hit a low!  They simply focus on what has gone right and how much potential resides with the future!  They do not fail, they simply acknowledge what did not work out and figure out how to fix it.  When we focus on failures and acknowledge them as failures, then we not only discourage ourselves, but we waste energy and time focusing on something we can not change.  I do not fail, I may have set backs, but they are not failures.  This journey, much like any other is simply a learning experience.  Everyday brings new experiences and new opportunities!  Such as yesterday, while working on some things I ended up talking with a dude who is friends with the man who supplies Ellen’s green room brownies!  Who knows where that will take me, but that is something totally unforeseen!  It’s moments like this that make the experience exciting!
 
A lot of cool things are goin on and it’s time that I get back to it to keep the momentum going.  Within the past month I’ve been on the radio, had a video vetted and ”promoted” by CNN ireport, talked to thousands of people, and other stuff!  So I need to keep at it!  With that said, I’m off to wear my new Ellen DeGeneres underwear!  Yes, I made myself Ellen DeGeneres underwear!  

Really Miss Washington? Really?

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What is it about the silent chase that draws my thoughts to a simple taste?
What is it about the simple pleasure executed by a dimple?
How is it that one holds more than another?  That one is better than an other?  That choice is both the greatest gift and worst decision of thrift we can rejoice?
The more I flirt, the more I hurt, the more I erode to dirt.  I put in all the work, only for circumstances to distort, to lose a friend I had promised I’d stand beside to the end.
Of raw emotion, I can’t question my devotion, like the waves of the ocean, my thoughts reside with unnerving motion.  Rocking back and fourth, caressing the bed of your perceived worth.
Your laugh gone, it feels wrong, but my decision, executed with precision, is your choice to rejoice.  
 
I’m not your pet, I’ve paid my debt, and I’m not about to be the loser in this bet.
I played your game and gave you the prize, I wish I had the chance to learn my answer from your eyes.  If you meant what you said, as my tears caressed the bed, as I further lost the mind inside my head, how dare you lead me down the path I tread.  What concoction of joy and selfishness did you blend, to force me to throw it in the open, no restraint with an open gait?  You say, “Go ahead, tell me!  Tell me, it might change the situation!”  It did as I followed through with your bid, it changed the situation, it removed me all together, like shedding some useless feather, you didn’t even attempt to fight, you agreed like everything was alright.  How am I suppose to confide in a person who would let me walk, let me walk without the slightest attempt to talk?  You let me go after forcing me to let you know?  This is why I say goodbye!  You know what I want, I’m tired of the taunt, I’m tired of the shadow, either I’m the one casting it in this blip we all get, or I’m gone, despite the fact I can never be, because you’ve trapped me. 

Largest Ellen Line Dance in the History of the World and Toddler Gods!

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As Ellen’s Midwest General I’ve managed to get on the radio and begin one of many attempts at complete world domination!  Last Saturday went amazing and it’s only going to get bigger and better from here!  Lot’s of other cool things are in the works, I’ll keep ya all surprised!  Nothing wrong with a good surprise!
   Laugh, Dance, Conquer! 
 
While on facebook the other day my friend Ada posted an article, “http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science_and_environment/10132762.stm” discussing the fact that humanity has officially created life!  She posted the following comment.
 
“Dr. Verber: “If we can really get cells to do the production that we want,…” So… what that really means is once again, in efforts to learn more about genetic engineering most geneticists’ attempts at creating [from] and consequentially destroying these Knows to obtain their components without knowing how to reconstruct the Knows. …To create new life, we destroy what is, however, we don’t know how to recreate what is.
We can only manipulate the Given to create what isn’t, and without
knowing how to return to the Given, there is no escape in case we
absolutely fuck up humanity. We are toddler gods let loose in a
university lab like it’s the playground at the mall. Scant on parental supervision of the future.”

  

In reality she’s right!  We are the only species publicly disclosed, just in case you believe in ancient astronauts, that have the capability to manipulate so much of what we control.  The great paradox being that we truly do not control anything.  When a species has discovered the mechanics behind life, resulting in the ability to disrupt billion year evolutionary trends simply on a whim, that puts us in a league of our own.  Don’t even start to think down the path of technology and microbiology combining together.  That concept alone implies that humanity has the capability to create a unique phylogenetic chain in and of itself!  The repercussions being much like all things regarding existence, totally unknown and taken on faith!  This is so cool, but so very scary!  The fact that cellular machinery can be turned on and off, reanimating some organisms, provides a whole other level to the interpretation of what life is.  Thus the gist of what I’m getting at from this is that we really have no way to define what life is, what the spark that defines it is about, why it’s important outside of some code doing a  job!  When I think about things like this it helps me put events into perspective. 
  
Upon realizing that we can’t truly define something anyone reading this is doing, LIVING, how in the world can you take anything to heart?  How can you ever truly be offended?  How can you find excuses not to enjoy life?  When realizing something like this, how can you take attacks personal?  To expand the argument, we can’t define our own emotions!  What is love?  What is jealousy?  What is passion?  What is hope?  What is anger?  In one aspect all these things are nothing more than some chemical reaction, the result of some astrocyte, neurotransmitter, synaptic threshold.  Why do we put so much into the meaning behind a gesture, why not just enjoy the pleasures of life, whatever that is?
 
Maybe one of the reasons I’m pondering all this is because today I had to get rid of one of my closest friends.  I love her, but timing and circumstances apparently will never be right.  Even when things felt right something had to come along to mess it up.  I know I love her because I’ve made a valiant effort not to.  I’ve done everything I can do to push her away and I still can’t let go.  I waited to long to say what I needed to say.  I let someone else come along and claim her.  I thought that would help ease getting her out of my head, but it didn’t.  It made it worse, it made me dislike a genuinely nice guy for no fault of his own.  I don’t like being that person, I don’t like disliking someone because I gave them an opportunity they took. 
 
I don’t know when things can be right.  Is it ever the right time to create life?  Is it ever the right time to take on faith the positive implications of generating your own microorganism?  I enjoy talking with her, her company, even her smell.  But I don’t think I can do it anymore.  It’s going to be painful either way I look at it.  But I can’t be the shadow, I won’t be.  Every time I hear her voice or see her face a smile comes to mine.  It’s like the chaos of existence simply dissipates.  Decisions don’t need to be made because I don’t have to think, I just do!   But every time I talk to her, it drives me crazy, in good and bad ways ;)
I love you baby doll, it doesn’t bother me to say that anymore.  I feel sorry for myself that it did.  I hope you stay happy and whenever times get rough you need to realize what you let walk away.  I’m good looking, tall, blonde, and amazing at like everything.  I won’t have any issues, but you will always own a piece of me.  I’m actually listening to “Nobody knows it but me – babyface” as I type this.  Somehow I’ve become one of those dudes I make fun of.  I don’t know what romantic love is, because like so many other important aspects you can’t define it.  But I know I love you because that’s the only answer that makes sense in my head.  It’s the only way I can rationalize how I feel.  So fuck you, have a nice life, and don’t ever think I’m not thinking about you.  You know me better than I should of let you.  Why is that? 

  

“To create new life, we destroy what is, however, we don’t know how to recreate what is.”

UPDATE: Largest Ellen DeGeneres Line Dance in the WORLD!

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Yesterday I talked to approximately 600 people about the event taking place this coming Saturday at 1:00pm! I want a 100,000, a 1,000,000, I want an entire block covered with people doing the Ellen, holding Ellen’s face! In the process of talkin to everyone I got thrown out of some art show/expose/fundraiser in a back ally for not having a pink bracelet! Ended up shouting at the top of my lungs that I as proud to be black at some African American Heritage event goin on at the square, walked through the OTR fringe festival, and hung w/the NO, NO, NO More venue! It’s amazing what kind of trouble one can get into when they make it a point to get into trouble! Crossin my fingers to keep this up! Largest Ellen DeGeneres Line dance in the history of the world! It’s going to be amazing!

Laugh, Dance, Conquer!

A question of Savagery

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20 million Driver ants sweep across the African jungle. Weighing some 20 kg they kill all invertebrates within a 300 meter radius. They come across a slug and in a matter of minutes cooperation allows them to dry it out by piling mud all over its mucus membranes. They then rip it to pieces. A grasshopper and a cockroach flee in fear. Yet their exit is guarded by ant birds, birds that have recognized the ant feast as a means of taking easy prey trying its best to escape. Some escape, but in the end most will die. Constantly killing and devouring at the cost of maintaining the colony, the ants cooperation leads the colony on a never ending search for food.. When they consume all of an areas protein, they simply move on looking for another paradise. It is such logic demonstrated by Americans concerning the untamed west. Like an unstoppable flood we entered into another’s area and decimated their land, devoured a culture, and ruined a people. We did such a thing simply because it was our “right” and in our best interest. It was done mindlessly and organized in a frenzy which revolved around a simple concept, greed. It is the intent of this paper to demonstrate the true meaning of savageness. Can one say the acts of the driver ant are savage? Is not their decree simply to provide life to their cause? Is it not their natural purpose, divine right if you will (because they have been placed in such a position to control this realm of reality) and their duty to act in such a manner? We must step back from the onslaught of the standard view of the American West and question if the Native Americans where truly savage; we must analyze the meaning of civilized, and then question the acts of a civilized nation. In a sense savagery and civilization are interlocked in an intricate swarm. For though they are two different entities they appear as one simply because civilized nations tend to focus on economics as a way of establishing power.
As so many know, the west has been romanticized about. The cowboys upholding that which is grand about American. Defending our law against the ignorant savage pest known as the Indian. But this concept is oxymoronic in a sense. For the ones calling the other savage, are living in a nation whose progress was developed off of the savage Indian. An article entitled “The Founding Indian Fathers” which was scribed by anthropologist Jack Weatherford, describes such a situation. This article explains how the European settlers knew little about democracy. This being the result of their ancestry coming from countless monarchs whose right to rule was established by God. Upon settling in America a major concern was established; according to the Articles of Confederation some thirteen separate and sovereign states where to make up one country. How could this be true if they did not yield their own power? This problem was solved by Iroquois chief Canassatego during an assembly in 1744. He explained to the settlers how his people developed a union called the League of the Iroquois. This union united 5 principle Indian Nations- the Mohawk, Onondaga, Seneca, Oneida, and Cayuga. This organization was developed under a constitution some time between 1000 and 1450 A.D and involved these principle sovereign nations meeting on set dates to discuss issues. Thus under this concept they where unified. The League of the Iroquois intrigued many of the founding fathers, like Benjamin Franklin whose job included publishing the records of various Indian assemblies and treaty organizations. Eventually this concept developed into the House and the Senate. It is in this sense that each state holds individual power yet meets to discuss issues as a unified whole.
Assistant professor of History, from the University of Wisconsin and Pulitzer Prize winning (1932) Frederick Turner wrote numerous books about the American West. He was considered one of the leading experts on the subject. Yet through his readings one comes across ideas like

“So long as free land exist, the opportunity for competency exists, and economic power secures political power.”

“The frontier is the outer edge of the wave-the meeting point between savagery and civilization.”

One must ask Turner if by civilization he means a society that values intangible concepts like wealth which places value on paper over recognition of culture and cooperation. Countless times we have an expert describing the West and its inhabitants as savage inferior obstacles. It is with such thinking one begins to question our own form of government. For being based off these savages in some sense, we have come to a conclusion. Greed is more important than society. It is a self replacing idea that is being demonstrated over and over again. Today this example of greed is what is leading to the destruction of our biodiversity hot spots and our own environment. It is this obsession towards money, expansion, economic power, that has become our driving force. This idea does not better or civilize an individual or society but leads to its demise. For through our lustful need to fulfill some void with tangible purpose we are removing the essence of ourselves. We are separating ourselves from the land. We use barbaric and driving means to deny concepts like equality and righteousness to help maintain our own corrupted means. Like the Driver Ants we swarm, taking everything for ourselves without regard. Then when we no longer have it, move on.
Is this Civilization, is this the Best of Civilization Proposed by Pulitzer Prize winning Jane Tompkins in her piece, “At the Buffalo Bill Museum“?
In this article she comes across a picture with a moose in it and she questions if an act of preservation is occurring. For in the picture a man from a canoe is about to shoot it.  She comes across a picture entitled “His First Lesson”, in which a horse is being tormented by some men. She can not decide what the lesson is in. To obey?, to behave?, stand still?, etc? Yet all of the subjects she mentions involve the control of life. The manipulation of movement. While in the museum she also observes the countless trophies of elk, buffalo, moose, etc. These animals all haunted by people who admired them and respected them. What are museums keeping safe for us, after all (593) Is this the Best of Civilization? This concept to control and overpower? To demonstrate warped views of rights? From this article one comes to a conclusion, people fear their existence. A point developed by Tompkins is that a museums purpose is to act as a safety deposits box. To allow the world to know we were here; it is through this idea that we find ways to express this. As pointed out the museum was all bone and claw. Is it the act of a civilized nation to focus on control?
“There will he see the field where his busy brain and thinking hand can find space and material to work, and an opportunity to rear from its virgin civilization institutions which shall bless generation yet to be.” this quote by (C.W. Dana) addresses a strong fallacy about the west. For how can one describe such an area as having virgin civilizations and institutions? The league of Iroquois was developed some 600 plus years before the invasion and settlement of America. How can complete ignorance exist.? Is this the fallacy of civilization? To be settled in a standard way.
 In nature, an organism that does not evolve goes extinct. This concept is very evident in America today.  If we do not make it a point to learn from the mistakes of the past, to recognize the value within the savage, to carry on conversation with open mind and heart.  If we do not make it a point to listen and observe the truths hidden to us because of countless blinders we accept as normal, a great many losses will result.  If we allow greed to consume us, if we accept the mechanics of tangible monetary value, our insatiable appetite will cost us a great many resources.  If we are unable to take a step back and reevaluate the reason behind why we do what we do, we are no better than a Driver Ant.  We are no better than an insect functioning off “instinctive” behavior.  Is that the definition of civilization? 

The day has just begun!

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So today I found out that one of my videos was vetted by CNN, making me an official CNN ireport superstar!  I then attended my great aunts funeral.  It was a different experience, “Amen, praise the Lord, hallelujah!”  It was one of those things that you had to be there to witness to truly get.  It made me giggle.  Not to come off as creepy or weird for laughing at a funeral, but my great aunt was an amazing women.  Outside of being hands down one of the greatest bakers of all time, she probably smoked two packs a day and could drink more than her fair share of whiskey.  Considering that she was 88, I think we can agree she fought the good fight!  Even in death she looked more intimidating than most the gangsters I’ve come across! 

 
While sitting in the church my grandmother and aunt (her sister) got into a tiff about reincarnation.  I don’t know how or what I do, but it never fails that I end up in the middle of an argument between two aggressive women.  I couldn’t help but reflect on the fact that aggressive women are what I’m all about.  To my right we got my mom, who has busted a nose or two in her heyday.  Then to my left there is my grandmother who still has red hair!  She’s the definition of what you don’t mess with.  Get on her good side, cause she can be heartless when she needs to be.  Behind me is my aunt, who keeps making it a point to poke me in the back, trying to recruit me to come to her church and listen to her sermon!  The whole situation is just hilarious, “Amen, praise the lord, hallelujah!” because the entire service is taking place in a predominately black church.  The “preacher(s)” had bling, “Amen, praise the Lord, hallelujah!”  So that in and of itself already added a whole nutha level of awkwardness.  But it was cool, nice to know that other members of my family have defined themselves as individuals.  Doing their own thing, no matter how unconventional!  Anyone reading this really has to take into consideration the context of the whole situation, just so many cultural cues and exchanges that made the event enjoyable and fun, despite the circumstances!  
 
But in the mist of reflection it was nice to see that side of the family together.  It’s kinda sad that we never make time for each other outside of weddings and funerals, but one can always find some good in circumstances they otherwise shouldn’t.  I know that while waiting for the sermon to start I talked to some old women who broke her wrist in a motorcycle accident.  You have no idea how awesome that is!  It’s sad that she got hurt, but the fact she got hurt riding on a motorcycle is just crispy!  But as stated before, the women in my family and/or who affiliate with my family are some tough broads!  Honestly when I hear the boy’s talkin bout gettin their boys sometimes when I’m out and about, I always know that I got my mom and grandma.  Take it from me, they will mess you up!
 
Shortly afterwards, ”Amen, praise the Lord, hallelujah!” I went to a local park that over looks Cincinnati to scream, “I love Ellen DeGeneres!”.   While standing atop the hill I ran into this old white dude totally mackin out with this young hot black thing!  So obviously I had to go over and check out the situation, she had a lip ring!  I then ran into someone doing some local campaigning for office and my day hasn’t even started yet!  Tonight I have to go to party in the park, recruiting more support for Ellen World Domination!  So who knows what stories and adventures await me there?  If you all take nothing else from this, take the fact that fun and excitement are always available.  Even in the mist of gloomy times, the memories that make you sad for your loss are soothing.  You never know who or what your goin to run into!  Props to the old white dude making out in his sweet ride with his sweet girl.  Props to my great aunt for leaving behind many friends!  Props to old women who ride motorcycles!  Props to anyone who chooses to keep it happy.  The day we learn to embrace a smile instead of focusing on all that is wrong with the world, that is the day we can truly get to know how strange the world we live in is!

I Think I Love You? A poem about a friend!

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I find it strange the things ones heart can arrange!
I find it strange how quick things change.
How the right thing is sometimes deranged.
How fast innocence can age.
How fun is second to a wage.
 
I sit in my car a rising star,
yet so very far from my grasp, the things afar.
But with each breath I gasp, my hands come closer to grasping everything I’ve been asking.
With this energy, resulting from countless works synergy, I am still a roach on a wall, aware that the higher I crawl, the further I’ll fall. 
I’m only in it for a fun time.  Maybe to meet a lovely dime, who will whisk away my breath w/each rhyme.  No amount of fame can frame the beauty of mud, the way I lust for my heart to thud.
 
How love accumulates despite my bitter distaste from a Serene embrace.  Do I act out of haste, or is this genuine taste?  How I want to kiss her round face!
So short, so cuddly, so witty, and mean!  A Scorpios sting is something worthy to redeem.
Baby doll we’ll be friends forever.  Never ever could I live with myself for hurting you.  And that’s just what I’d do!  Girls like you are very few, for girls like you can say the real Forest I knew. 
The Forest through the trees, the Forest on his knees, the Forest who would do anything to please.  The Forest who understood what hid beneath the hood.  The Forest who kissed my hand, because he enjoyed how time would stand.  Love does not burn my lips, for within your hips, down to your ugly toes, I can smell the fluorescent color which glows as that tumor inside me grows.
I know what is hid behind your lovely lids.  I know the joy in being your toy.  I know the warmth of your insides and the trust I dare not confide as I continue to hide.  I think I love you, as my ignorance grew.  I know I love you, for without you my face turns blue.  Your that breath of toxic air, which warms my face with a loving stare.  Feel free to give me your sexy glare, because you’ll never be aware of how much I care.   

Reflections on the Day!

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Today one of my facebook friends was talkin about how she is never going to love another man.  How she is never going to open herself up to another person.  I couldn’t help but tell her to stop her bitching!  For starters, the fact that she has been hurt is a good thing!  It means that she is alive, that she is real, and that she is a person capable of caring for another greater than herself.  Some people go their entire lives wishing for just a chance at heartbreak.  I don’t know about you, but I would never trust anyone who hasn’t had their heart broke.  Trust is something earned, it should never be freely given.  But I would never trust anyone who at their core feared trusting another person.  You may get hurt, you may get screwed over, but if you truly fear opening yourself up, why even play the game?  That’s what makes love so amazing and interesting.  The great romantic interplay between passion and work.  In the end if your willing to put in the work and the other person isn’t, they choose to snuff out the flame you’ve learned that person isn’t going to preserve your fire!  Because of this incident I totally listened to Celine Dion’s song, “I am Alive” like a million times!  OMG, her and Whitney Houston give me chills!  Hit it girl, hit it!
 
I find it amazing how creative our species is! I find it equally amazing how impossible is still part of our everyday vocabulary!  You’d think that in mist of our existence on this planet, the things we’ve learned, the questions that plague us, and in the essence of cellular interaction, allowing us to think and rationalize these concepts,  we’d realize impossible is a word used only by the those who have not yet learned just how much potential resides within themselves!  

While out and about conquering the Midwest for Ellen DeGeneres I often come across people who love Ellen, but are afraid to dance!  People say they can’t dance, that they are to embarrassed, that they are afraid.  This idea bothers me!  We shouldn’t be afraid to dance!  We shouldn’t be afraid to mingle, to talk, to shake it.  We shouldn’t fear accusations from other people who are not dancing.  We shouldn’t be intimidated by people who are better dancers.  In the end the best dancers in the world at one point were people learning how to two step!  If your going to get advice on how to do something, take it from somebody who knows more than you.  If your afraid to risk looking like a fool, you don’t deserve the awards that come from being a fool!  If you fear the repercussions of how others will perceive the way you dance, then you’re never really dancing for yourself.  If you don’t make it a point to dance for yourself, then who are you dancing for?  Why even dance at all?  If you don’t like dancing, that’s cool too, but for someone to admit disliking fun, that is crime against yourself! 

 
People often say that a life lived for others is a life worth living.  But if your living your life for others and your not happy, then your not doing anyone justice.  If you wake up every morning thinking about how much you dislike your current situation in life, then I ask you why you don’t do something different?  Why don’t you fix that problem?  Why is it that so many people seem unhappy?  How can we fix this?  Maybe if we focused on the core issues that make people unhappy we could start a revolution.  You’d think that in this day and age there would be a major movement to bring happiness to the world!  Somethin simple like, “Get Happy!”  But what do I know?  In the words of some people I’ve talked with, I’m just some young idealist who will figure it out.  Anyone who reads this know that the words FUCK YOU come to mind whenever I hear someone say something like this to me!  Hopefully you make it a point think the same thing!  If it wasn’t for idealist America would not be the nation it is and interracial relationships would never of been attempted. On that note, keep it real my gangsta freaks!

SMIBBIT “muah, muah, muah baby doll!”

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I’ve spent the past few days doin my grind!  Oh I feel so ghetto, but at least I keeps it real!  Been walkin up and down the streets dancin with people!  Funny how many people go, “That is how Ellen DeGeneres dances!”  I’m like, “I know, hence Do the Ellen!”  It’s tiring work being the self proclaimed Midwest general, but someones got to do it!  I don’t even know if you can count it as work.  Every mile I’ve spent each day walkin the streets, dancin, laughing, and huggin people has been energizing!  I can feel the potential bundling up from every activity, just waiting for kinetic energy to knock it loose!  Due to my buddies ghost on a stick video I’ve energized my thought process a trillion times over.  It’s weird how the smallest occurrences can set off huge chain reactions.  Considering I live in a world that could be blown away in a literal sense by a very similar mechanism, you’d think this wouldn’t come to me as a surprise!

 
Despite the many giant strides currently being made by myself and Greg, he really does love Cincinnati, I keep finding myself coming back to the thought of my smibbit!  It’s weird how friendships develop sometimes.  What’s even stranger is how fond the heart grows when it’s not granted the attention it wants.  People are reading this wondering who smibbit is.  She’s officially my new BFF!  She’s not really one of those friends that I can ever picture not in my life, which is a new life perspective for me with the consideration of my buddy Josh, whom I’ve been friends w/since 5th grade!  It’s also very weird for me to have a BFF that I want to fuck all the time!  I don’t know what it is, just somethin about her.  It’s the strangest things that make her sexy.  Her ridiculously annoying laugh.  The horrible way she dresses.  The way she breathes when she’s excited.  Don’t even get me started on how poorly manicured her hands are.  But it’s the countless imperfections within her that make her special.  It’s the faulty aspects that make her someone I’ll keep around.  It’s because of these and countless other aspects any chick I ever meet in the future is goin to have to gain her approval.  Sometimes I find myself wondering if I really want her to approve!
 
They’re a lot of similarities with this relationship and my passion to pursue dancing with Ellen DeGeneres!  For starters, back when I started the project I questioned my ability to get the ball rollin.  But everyday that I didn’t spend fondling it, the more I wanted to do it!  The more I needed to do it!  The more I told myself I was goin to do it!  Our dreams, ambitions, and passions are part of us.  They make us who we are.  It’s because of these desires that we craft and mold our lives the way we do.  When we ignore them our hearts grow fond.  The longer we try to bury how much we value them, the longer we lie to ourselves, the more we start to dislike ourselves for not being ourselves.  
 
Much as my affection towards my friend, the imperfections in our plans of execution are what make our dreams truly something worthy of our seduction.  The day’s that don’t go right, the meetings that end bad or produce nothing.  The people and entities that try to shoot you down and at times get to you a little.  Each victory, each success, each day that goes better than expected.  Each time something unexpected occurs in your favor, these  are the moments that make the bad so much more palatable.  These are the moments that actually make the sour hours sweet and succulent.  These are the moments where you step back and go, “Damn, it’s not what I pictured it to be like, but I can’t wait for the next time I have to work my way through something dirty, just because I like a challenge!”  Eventually all the things that stress us out are going to be the best stories for us to tell.  These are the events that make our journey, our pursuit for our dream ours.  These are the obstacles that make it real.  When we love the imperfections, we know our feelings are true!  This is how we know the object of our pursuit are an entity of value.  Because truthfully when you’re on your journey, even when it’s rough it’s still fun, cause you’re doing your thing ;)